TRUST – it is what I am having the hardest time with in my life right now.
In my quiet time with God, when I am reading his word, when I am closing my eyes in worship, I hear it whispered ever so gently to my heart: “Trust”.
I am at a crossroads in my life. There is so much unknown facing my life right now. I have absolutely no idea what is in store. I do know that there are relationships that will be developed and strengthened, hurts that will be healed, friendships that will be born, old chapters that will close, and new stories that will be written.
Deep down I want to completely let go, fully trust, listen to that whisper in my heart and say, okay God, I trust you
I am terrified. I am scared of having trust broken once again in my life. I am scared of the hurt that comes along with it. I want to protect myself, and somehow I feel putting everything into my own hands will keep me from being knocked down into a pit once again.
But…I know that thinking that way is wrong and will only lead to destruction.
I have a God who loves me, who hurts along with me, who wants the best for me, who has so much happiness in store for me. He promises in his word that joy comes after sorrow.
So even though it is very frightening to trust, I choose to work daily on listening to that whisper in my heart, the one that promises restoration, renewal, and joy,
And on the days when I feel myself tightly gripping the reigns of my life and taking matters into my own hands, I will cling to his word.
“Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation.” Psalm 91:14-16 NIV
The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song. Psalm 28:7 NIV
If you wake me each morning with the sound of your loving voice, I’ll go to sleep each night trusting in you. Point out the road I must travel; I’m all ears, all eyes before you. Save me from my enemies, God—you’re my only hope! Teach me how to live to please you, because you’re my God. Lead me by your blessed Spirit into cleared and level pastureland. Psalm 143:8-10 The Message